Things That Suck Monkey Mold Today

I don’t have time for a lengthy post today. If you want one of those, read my archives.

Today, in case you have just emerged from under your rock to read this, is the one-year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. In fact, if you live in New Orleans, you probably are living under a rock. Why, after one year in the Greatest Country In The World would you be doing this? Because, unless they are super rich, George Bush doesn’t care about Americans. If you are an African American, well, he really, really doesn’t care about you. If you are poor, he probably couldn’t see you if you poked him with a stick. “What’s poking me? What’s going on? What’s my name? Where am I? Help, a pretzel is looking at me! Laura, read me a story.” Poor people, you are less than nothing to George W. Bush; which is why, one year later in the richest country in the world, you are still living in a FEMA trailer next to a concrete pad that used to be your house. That’s if you are lucky enough to have scored a trailer; otherwise, it’s the rock for you.

Who does The Dubya care about besides his daddy, Karl Rove, rich people, and the nice invisible voice who lives in his ear and tells him what to say in press conferences? He cares about Iraqis. And Iranians. He must, because he keeps giving them all our money, or is planning to give them all our money. (But he doesn’t care about North Koreans, no matter how many missile tests they conduct—because Koreans don’t have any oil; they only have cabbages. George W. Bush doesn’t care about cabbages.) Hezbollah is already rebuilding southern Lebanon, so why is New Orleans still a mess? It’s really shocking that a tiny band of Middle Eastern terrorists could provide better reconstruction services to the locals than our own government can provide to us. The education budget in the USA is being slashed, social programs are being cut, one in six Americans has no health insurance at all, and over half have less insurance than they need. During the recent fracas in Lebanon, even with all the war apparatus and equipment we have practically next door in Iraq, we were the last country to make arrangements to get our people out of there. And the list goes on. It’s a damn, dirty shame, and I’m embarrassed to be an American right now.

Well, that’s it for now. I’m all bummed out. I’ll try to be more cheerful and witty for you tomorrow. In fact, I’ll have a review of Beerfest for you, god help me. Girl Kid’s b-friend really wants to see this one-star flick from the dudes who brought us Super Troopers, so you know it will be pretty bad. There is just no explaining the mind of a teenage boy—I suspect lizards live in there. Well, in just a couple of months, I won’t be invited along anymore, because they’ll be able to drive off laughing to see R-rated movies all on their own…and I will be sad because my babies are all grown up. What are a few more heinous movies under the belt compared to that?